Thursday, June 12, 2003

R.I.P.
Splinter..
1983-2003


Teenage Mutant Ninja Burger
The Modern Day Expansion to Ninja Burger: The Role-Playing Game

When the economy slumps, competition between fast-food franchises heats up! In their mad rush to simulate Ninja Burger's™ Unbelievably Secret Wasabi Sauce®, the dishonorable dogs at Otaku Bell™ accidentally exposed a batch of their I Can't Believe Its Not Wasabi! Sauce® to nuclear radiation. While tasty, the radioactive paste was deemed a failure after the test animals began to exhibit strange side effects; the frequent spouting of clichéd catchphrases and a penchant for the martial arts. A crazed Otaku Bell™ scientist stole the afflicted animals and opened his own fast-food chain: Mahjong-os™, where all pizzas are delivered within thirty minutes or they're on us!* Teenage Mutant Ninja Burger pits the honorable Ninja Burger™ employees against their toughest opponents yet -- highly intelligent, super strong, pizza-toting mutant animals. And, as if that weren't enough, it provides rules for state-of-the-art security systems and heavily armed guards to the delivery location as well. Luckily, Teenage Mutant Ninja Burger also contains Requisition Forms for new equipment and details on Wujenitsus, recently developed by the benevolent Ninja Masters, for use in today's hi-tech world. Combine all that with a new, controversial Ninja Sub-Clan, and you have the makings of one bodacious supplement!

$5.95 from NINJA BURGER

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